| Inching along towards something |
[15 May 2008|06:36pm] |
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music |
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Santogold ~ Unstoppable |
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Well grades were posted today; the damage? An "A" in Statistics, an "A" in Business Communication and a "B" in International Business. 9 more credits in the can.
So now I have 86 credits towards the 128 needed for a B.A. Errr. Ok, it's way better than just coming in at the Associate's level and I'm just 4 credits shy of "senior" rank. But it seems so...err...out of reach still. This summer I'm taking 7...maybe 10 credits (haven't paid for the last class yet).
I guess I'm just feeling that this degree is so darn elusive. And what about graduate school? Jeez...I don't even want to think about it! Why does freakin' college have to take up so much of your time?!?
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| Le grumble, Le growl...Im looking for the life boat 'cause Im treading water... |
[14 May 2008|06:32pm] |
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mood |
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Tomorrow is another day.. |
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okay Im cranky,..I've haven't had much sleep in the past day and a half, boi's knee is bothering him, he's coming down with something and running a slight fever, I've been chewing my cuticles over a private matter, then?...the computer..yes MY computer went on the fritz..I didn't back up files I lost everything pretty much, my creative writings, most of my pictures, and I LOST all my chats with Wolfman, this hurt a great deal. At least I had backed some stuff up on my laptop..so it wasn't a total loss..
AND a desktop makes all the difference in the world when I'm trying to do online reads.
When I popped the lid off the computer, the motherboard was smoking..GEE...SOO not a good sign, I went to get Boi's old computer to fire up and his hard drive is gone as well as ALL his memory. WTF? GEE THANX THOMAS (the pothead kid who tried to rip off Boi through another computer, manage to take what the hell he wanted anyway. Thank god those sorts of people don't hang around long they'd have a short shelf life knowing full well we'd require our pound of flesh..)
Here's a lovely tho blurry picture that Cody took of me..Im sorta disappointed about the days events but I don't allow it to define my mood ALL of the time. I refuse to globalise my ire which means I'm focusing on the problem at hand instead of drawing everything and everyone else into it. I found a computer for about 100.00 and I came up short about 60.00 This is basically two reads on the sliding scale, so Im scrambling to find a way to raise the $$ by Friday or Saturday so I can hopefully have a working computer by sunday.
Is it me...or is just about everyone I know is feeling like crap...? you'd think it was a mercury retrograde with the way people's relationships are floundering, (I've had several phone calls today of people desperate to talk and unload their problems on a sympathic ear..or the way computers seem to float in and out of tech consciousess not just mine!.) Jobs seemed to elude a few neigbhors who are wondering where their next paycheck is coming..but in spite of all that, the sun was shining, I planted some seeds, transplanted some sunflowers, cut back on the mint, lavendar and rosemary, tied them up in bunches and strung them up among the wall..
Funny but I'd be right at home too, polishing guns and 22's, sharpeningbowie knives and dirks. Something about weapons...and the need to blow shit up from time to time...its good to achieve a balance in more ways than one..
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| And to give my birthday a little tinge of badness... |
[14 May 2008|01:53pm] |
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someone broke into my car last night and took my iPod from the glove compartment. I hope an All-Spark makes it become sentient and kills him horribly.
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[13 May 2008|12:26pm] |
So today I start my vacattion birthday. I don't have to see work until next Monday. Today I need to put my textbooks on amazon for resale(I need to make SOME money back from that class considering I bombed them and my work won't give any money back for classes that I make less than a C in.), finish the moving process and... I don't think anything else. Meh
But for my birthday me + a few others are going to be at the Pearl on the 15th. 11:00 pm- ???? For those who can, I would love to see you there. If you need address or directions drop me a comment or give me a call 210-6194. Anyway, time to go visit the Mrs. at work :)
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| When one gets to the end of their rope do you swing? |
[12 May 2008|03:55pm] |
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mood |
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French Fried Brain.. |
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music |
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Shpongle: Dorest Perception |
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Mothers day was both amusing and annoying at every turn..
cue the annoyance factour, I heard "Smoke on the Water" over and OVER again..I was entertaining visions of someone wearing a bass guitar in a most interesting place, unable to sit down..and it wasn't the Boi. nope not at ALL..
When Boi plays the song "smoke on the water" its a mellow song..
when Dave plays its like **&#@!! napalm......a big KA-BOOM!
Boi got a new Amp..I was thinking "Oh Joy"
Sooo? I must have swallowed more Ibuprofen to relieve the pounding pain in my head over this past week than I have for the past six months. I don't get it, what the HELL have I done to be exposed to THIS?!?!. cheech and chong, surfer humour, pot humour..gaaaa..am I missing something here? yah yah yah, remininist about your glory days, in the wee hours of the morning...gently nag at me about my cluttered apartment until I lose my cool and as I'm trying to process this visit I can't help but howl aloud with jabbing pain in my head. I DON'T WANT MY MOTHER NAGGING at me 'kay?
(You Pisces Men are bonafide whack jobs even if some of you are somewhat reliable....Y'all make better friends than the alternative..seriously I learned my lesson! Not going to make the same mistake ..nope not me not a bit..Pisces men with Cancer moons hold on tenaciously to their people like possessions, Pisces with Aries moons are emotionally convoluted, fall in and out of love like 10 dollar hookers, hit them up with some serious smokable green leaf and they be happy li'l campers,..Pisces with moon in Virgo have that NEED for vitamins and the latest health fads, but it doesn't stop there, they HAVE to tell people to the point where some of us are considering manslaughter just to SHUT THEM UP....HEY I know what IM talking about! .)
Thank God He flew out early this morning, Im sure my headache broke when he landed in Denver and switched planes..
I'll see him around Christmas where he will take 16 days off SIXTEEN DAYS ?!?! ..(I was hyperventilating looking around for a paper sack, but managed to conceal my distress.. Im making plans to be outta town. I can't take 2 weeks and 2 days, my head will simply pop with the hypertension, I'd just collapse on the floor with blood pouring out of my nose, eyes and ears..and what will he do? continue to talk impervious of a dead woman in a pool of her own blood. The only way he would even notice is if he actually slipped and fell on his ass.
ehhh you think Im kidding?
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On a much lighter side..Sprite helped make my mother's day pretty sweet, she gave me sunflowers, two pounds of French roast coffee and dark chocolate, She and Boi were really sweet to me and helped to sooth my shattered nerves.
Normally I don't celebrate Mother's day because to my mind its like placing a bandaid on a festering sore, be good to a mother, the mother in your life, whether she's yours, your wife, your girlfriend, who ever...FOR the entire year round..
Or not, its a choice..but at least not a half assed choice.
Still I was pleasantly surprised, which should pretty much illustrate the fact that I don't get those sorts of surprises very often.
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| The story so far |
[10 May 2008|10:27am] |
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music |
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Lamb of god - Ruin |
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I'm awake. I want sleep however the body rejects the idea and I'm forced to proceed on with my day. So I find myself infront of the computer, Selina is sleeping still. She needs her rest. I am stress testing my pc. Running Vista on it. There are nice elements behind this OS but it is a resource hog. I am running into the issue where at times it randomly freezes up on me....and before I start using this as my primary machine, I've gotta get that solved.
In other thoughts, I'm not really feeling optimistic about this year's video project for AFO. Tons of ideas, unfortunately not enough resources, time, people, or the want to do this. Maybe it's just an artistic stump? Who knows. This can change if any one has the want for it? Or maybe we've just grown out of this idea. Let the kids play in their own created filth...or will we join to clean it up? Life has changed for everyone lately.
Then the stresses of everyday work life don't seem to mix in well and all I want to do is just hit my head on my desk or kick some one's head inward, go home and relax with Selina. I can't wait to go on vacation with Selina.
Anyway, that's all for now.
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| Should I or shouldn't I?! ehhh Im gonna flip a coin.. |
[09 May 2008|01:59am] |
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mood |
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Thoughtful and thats dangerous |
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music |
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Amon Amarth: Return of the Gods |
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*holds the newly sterilized piercing needle between her fingers thinking of all the places she could pierce on her body*..
gaaaaaaaack...Im more bored than I thought!
*doesn't rule out the side of her virgin nose, or another hole in her ear,
after ALL its like 2 am the hour when the crazies come out to plaaaay
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| After an ugly grey day yesterday.... |
[08 May 2008|05:09pm] |
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music |
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Die Krupps: To the Hilt |
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I'd bounced outta bed ready to face the morning. I couldn't get to sleep last night so I trundled down stairs to sit at the computer to fire off a couple of reads for people and after all was typed out.. I had the notion to start clearing out my gmail account of past letters bearing ill will and hurtful emotional content which didn't serve me one damn bit.NOT to mention some interesting videos that some *ahem* exes sent me well over a year ago to pique my interest again ehhhh NOOO! *laughs* why'd I have THAT hanging around?!?!, ..My philosophy is to weed out those elements which only shackle me to a past that for all intents and purposes is R.I.P. thus ensuring that the ground is prepared figuratively speaking for fresh growth. Once I'm done with someone or a situation, its done. Bridge is burnt, there's no going back. I've had plenty of practice...and please believe me when I say this it is without ego or bitterness FINALLY.., I can honestly look toward the future without baggage. ...Im going to howl one day and I won't be alone.
 ..
So during the day, a process in which something snapped inside and I was taking deep breaths instead of shallow half breaths. seriously I can't figure it out but a huge weight was lifted offa me. I had no idea I was emotionally carrying something that huge..its true enough that there's always going to be some sort of clearing out of residual stuff that crops up from time to time, but thankfully, unlike household dust that accumulates, the ties that bind do get severed and stay that way...thus allowing the healing to continue
**********************************************************************************
By the way? chiseling small beeswax chunks off 12 pound blocks with a flat head screw driver takes some great strength, I swear Im getting muscles for my effort..its not like paraffin wax where I can just wrap in a plastic bag and throw it on the patio to break in a couple of manageable pieces oohhhh nooooes..Beeswax is gooey but hard as hell to separate..the results tho are tapered candles with plenty of sheen and the colours so far are cherry red and dollar bill green! Candles Im making have this shape not too little and not too big. Since I've had plenty of practice, its getting easier to dip and roll. They sort of make themselves.
******************************************************************************************
Damon's just pierced Boi's earlobe twice, so the Boi is wearing the black ones in his left ear lobe....
..The guys went to Hot Topic and picked up some ear gauges. Good gawd but Damon wears some serious steel. those damn gauges weigh a pound apiece or 454 grams in each ear... he looks like he's wearing curved horns...the name of the company is Morbid Metals
I loves me kids...Boi was surprised when I told him I pierced my own ears when I was his age, so not to be outdone by his M O T H E R he sat there stoic, with no ice to numb the lobe while Damon jabbed the sharp steel needle into his ear lobe.. some blood no flinching.
"Pain" I said to Boi "is nature's way of telling you that you're alive" hehehehehe...the look on his face was AWESOME in the scowl he gave me...
Pizza's done..see y'all later!
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| new site |
[08 May 2008|12:50am] |
Whilst I work on the new pattern site my lovely associate gloria has updated her page for sale
she is making up my patterns for photography and to make sure of fit instruction, but what it means is there is a one of a kind, professionally made version of each outfit as it comes out
they are also, for the quality, very cheaply priced
http://www.bjdfashions.co.uk/
At the moment only the outfit on page 4, the EGL riding suit is my design, and there is a link to the pattern available (for sd13) there but Gloria has been a doll dressmaker for many years and her quality is top notch, I was very lucky to find her
as I said there will be a more pattern centric site being advertised soon, it's in progress at the moment I recommend taking a look at Gloria's page, there's not a lot there yet, but believe me, there's plenty coming.
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| i want to leave. |
[07 May 2008|07:24pm] |
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music |
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I'm a playa - Paul Wall. |
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So I have finally decided on the route for my life and my parents obviously are against it. You would think after years of being unguided and just wandering aimlessly they would be happy. Well I guess no regular parent would be happy with the decision I made. I was once in the Coast Gaurd and I left because I chickened out and was scared. Ever since I left I have regretted it. I want to go back I just never had the motivation up unitl a few months ago. Still within this year by the way. My parents think this is a bad time to join but I wasnt planning on leaving untill after we have a new President. I would like to see what direction they take us in and where they stand on this war. I was planning on going back into the Gaurd anyway, so it's not like they get sent over seas. I would still stay here and chill regardless. But I think I want to travel, so maybe the air force might get me this time around. Also j0nes is thinking about joining with me. Now the thing I havent exactly dropped on them is that I want to make this a carrer. No more few year run then out and live a regular civilian life. That I have never been happy with. I always knew I could amount to more but I didnt know where I would be best at. I'm almost positive that I would do great things in the military. So within these next few weeks I am going to look into things for j0nes and I. I am tired of school and I'm sure its never going to get tired of me. At least my wallet anyway, greedy bastards. Fuck them. I will get someone else to pay for me wasting time in nonsense bullshit classes. I mean seriously what am I ever going to need to know about music history? What is anyone ever going to need to know about it? So what we had old crap instruments and people used to sing all the time. We have great machines that blend beautifully with instruments now, why should I care about how they did it with crap wood and brass? And also histiroy, as long as we dont make the same mistake twice why do we really need to learn it in school. Lets say I am going to be a rocket scientist, why do they need to know who won the civil war or who Mozart was? It serves no purpose but to suck money dry from us. Vocational schools are really the way to go. They cut right to the chase. But of course my mother and father are so insistent on me graduating, when really it's my life and at 25 I'm sure I can make a logical decision as to where to take it. I just dont give a fuck anymore. And if I could leave as soon as this weekend I would. I need to get out and go already. I'm letting life pass me by under the comforts of my parents roof. I have friends who are out and married with kids or just on their own and have been for years. And here I am, sitting in my room in my parents house. So not where I saw myself at 25. Very pathetic. Anyway I'm going to eat dinner. Then shower and think. Please dont bother responding to any of this as I have disabled comments. Hell its not like anyone really reads my bi-monthly rants anyway.
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| mini update |
[07 May 2008|01:52am] |
Well i started back at school monday. i had a good week off. im helping out my dad more and its kinda challenging cause im so quiet and hes half deaf. but its better than leaving him to my half sister to "manage" from her wheel chair while on oxygen.
Ive spent some time with a choice person quite a bit lately who will currently remain nameless but i am happy :)
Little bro got his new toy and we are going to test it out soon at the range.
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| comma sutra |
[07 May 2008|12:30am] |
submitted by julia 
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| Woe. |
[06 May 2008|07:31pm] |
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mood |
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 blah |
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I kind of have two questions, but really one.
I bought a new wig for my doll and I was having a terrible time trying to find the right color. I finally found one on ebay in "Chocolate Brown" but when it arrived, apparently I have a different opinion on chocolate brown but this looks more like an ash brown. I'm kind of upset, because the photo was close to what I wanted (not perfect, mind you) but in person it's SO much lighter...
I know from my costuming experience that I could use sharpies to dye the wig, but I'm kind of worried it'd stain my doll or something. Bella's kinda precious to me, and I really don't want her to get ruined from something like that. Is there anyone who has experience with this sort of thing? Would it be worth dying my doll's wig or should I attempt to sell it? (Is there even a chance I'd get a good portion of what I paid for it BACK?) It's a really nice wig, but it's just *not* the right colour...
I feel so petty about being upset. *cough*
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| 600 mph isn't fast enough |
[06 May 2008|09:01pm] |
I'm no world traveler,
but I found it to be quite interesting being 3 hours behind out west, and how when we flew there the sun didn't make much progress in the sky.
On the flight back east, the day raced by as we lost 3 hours coming home.
They had the on board touch screens (which i've never seen before) that showed our location on a map of north america, and the aircraft's airspeed. At one point we reached about 650mph, nice! but that's not breaking any sound barriers.....
It's a shame they don't do supersonic travel anymore, because if they did, check out what it would be like riding faster than the rotation of the earth:
Concorde's cruising speed exceeded the top speed of the solar terminator. Concorde was able to overtake or outrun the spin of the earth. On westbound flights it was possible to arrive at a local time earlier than the flight's departure time. On certain early evening transatlantic flights departing from Heathrow or Paris, it was possible to take off just after sunset and catch up with the sun, landing in New York @ daylight. This was much publicised by British Airways, who used the slogan "Arrive before you leave."
other freaking cool things:
At twice a conventional airliner's cruising altitude, the view from the windows clearly showed the curvature of the Earth
Concorde flew fast enough that the weight of everyone onboard was temporarily reduced by about 1% when flying east. This was due to centrifugal effects since the airspeed added to the rotation speed of the Earth. Flying west, the weight increased by about 0.3%, because it cancelled out the normal rotation and, with it, the normal centrifugal force and replaced it with a smaller rotation in the opposite direction.[36] Concorde flew high enough that the weight of everyone onboard was reduced by an additional 0.6% due to the increased distance from the centre of the Earth.
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| Yesterday, t'was the Boi's birthday.. |
[06 May 2008|04:57am] |
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mood |
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Im harmless! REALLY!! |
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Megaherz: Wer Bist Du? |
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My little monster turned 17 yesterday. Im amazed at how tall he is, I'll have to switch over from referring to him as Boi and figure another term of endearment, something more suited to him. ..you guys can feel free to offer up suggestions. I figured Barnacle Butt Boi best illustrated his temperment...but yah Im open!
Last night, We had a birthday party at China Sun, we tanked up on seafood, crab, shrimp, mussels, sushi, rice and tea, we'd gestured with chopsticks at each other, burst into laughter for no apparent reason thus drawing curious looks from nearby patrons and because we know the managers really well, they'd stop by at the table to talk. We musta looked like quite a sight, Dave clean shaven chisled features looking like a basketball coach with his jeans, Oregon Ducks sweatshirt and nike tennis shoes, me in my long black velvet skirt, dark purple silk fringed waistcoat, silk shirt, long dark tresses tied back by a red velvet ribbon, Boi looking for all the world like a broody dark Danish Prince with upswept hair, piercing eyes, DAMON looking like the steam punk with his industrial jewelry and Sprite who'd had to work late, finally made it looking fresh in a gorgeous blue dress in spite of working 10 hours..
We were allowed to stay longer after they'd closed, I love those guys!
I was fascinated with the satellite radio in the rented car Dave was driving so on the way home I was switching channels and laughing hysterically, Israel talk radio?, Koren talk radio, oldies channel, BENNY GOODMAN for crying out loud! and I even got the traffic report for Tampa Bay Florida which is where Dave lives and this sent me off into hysterical laughter..Fat lotta good that's going to do him when he's driving in Eugene Oregon! yeeeesssss I amuse easily...I even dialed into a redneck channel in Texas, this program boosted of several HOW to's of checking out the local gun and RV shows..yahhhhh sitting on the back porch shooting at random shit is DEFINITELY a Redneck pastime.
Soooo Dave's in Portland right now attending another conference and will be gone for a couple of days..Good thing too, I needed a break from the erratic vibes which were dancing off the walls, rattling my brain dealing with the tremendous amounts of O.C. disorder, its like pleeeeeease I can't take it anymore, how many times have I answered the damn question? Boi takes it in stride and gently sets Dad straight especially when it comes to his future. I just STAYED the hell out of it. I believe in telling the kid EVERYTHING when it comes to his future, I don't believe in withholding opinion and support especially if this is going to help Boi in the long run..
Im sitting here with a lovely green tea clay mask, ...I look terrifying! *grins* My neighbor is coming home in about another hour, so I'll just wander out and check the mail early and hope I scare the crap out of him.! heh..I've done it before!..
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[06 May 2008|01:21am] |
Say hello to Mr. JP(Jigglypuff) Ernesto Stredwick-Armstrong
Anyway. School is... i'm just glad it's over.
Birthday in 8 days. Hit me up with a card or some love.
2120 Herschel St.
Apt. A
Jacksonville, FL 32204
J-Ville people, birthday celebration in the mix. Will give out more details soon.
All is good. A lot to do and not enough time to do it in. Later.
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| sorta sleepy in seattle |
[04 May 2008|11:35pm] |
It's my last night in Seattle,
Todd and I are crashing with my friend Sarah & her fiance, who were kind enough to spare us from a 4th straight night of hotel fees.
To sum up what I think about Seattle & the Northwest in general: I want to book another ticket, like right now....and come back within a few months time. The ace hotel in Seattle lived up to it's reviews.....cozy rooms, right in the heart of belltown, extremely helpful staff who are very into the local culture, but dont have the all too common attitude that comes along with it. Having Sarah, her man and her friends as tour guides defintely helped immensely.
We only spent 27 hours in Portland of which, the first 6 we spent wandering about aimlessly enjoying the local breweries...afterwards I decided to call a friend of a friend, whom i've never met before, just talked to on the internet and text a few times. She met us out, at this club on the 30th floor of a downtown portland highrise, broke the ice and proved to be a very chill lady who also became a tourguide.
Jenni, a recent transplant from Florida was fresh off the interstate, she had only been in portland for a whopping 3 weeks, but managed to show us a few quirky nightspots that were tucked away from the "mainstream" portland countercultre....
Portland's an interesting, unique town. Counterculture IS the mainstream there, so how do you rebel against that?
Either way, we called her up again today and she happily drove us all over portland, a japanese flower garden, outerlying areas and of course, the rogue brewery in which I bought a deadguy ale t-shirt. After a walking tour of downtown Portland in which we saw many, many many many quirky souls bumbling about ah of and course the buying of a doughnut with a satanic pentagram on it, we had to retreat back Seattle in order to get ready for the grueling cross country flight tomorrow.
much more to summarize but its already midnight on the westcoast, which means i've got some serious clock adjustment to do if i hope to return to my normal sleeping hours back east....
wow i said "back east"
I kinda like the ring of that.
alright, good night Seattle.
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| Help! |
[04 May 2008|05:16pm] |
Hello everyone,Im about to order a D.O.C (dream of children from dream of dolls) They have the option of buying the dress for 50$ more. I want to save the $50 bc the dress isnt all that good looking.
My question is ::Is it better to order a doll with her dress for resale purposes, if i choose to do so later. Or can i sale her nude as i buy her.. I geuss what is the value difference? One more question ::
The company sent out a newsletter saying if you want the free kitty ears order by May 31st & Pay by May 5th.
So by guesstament do you think If i pay tonight i should recieve them , or is it a slim chance since i didnt order May 31st? They do still have the option to order now..
ughh i just cant get ahold of the company ):
Thanx a million for any advice you give me..
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